Monday, July 29, 2013

Observation of a new cage

Last night was surprisingly comfortable!
I slept all through the night. No waking up half way through my sleep cycle with a painful hard on. Not once.
The only erection I was aware of was the one that I got after I woke up in the morning. They're not painful in this cage, just noticeably stifled.

One thing that is a little frustrating though is that even when I do get harder, my penis doesn't fill out the full length of the plastic sheath. I get stuck where it begins to bend downward, and my cock head doesn't go any further.
It's as though I was wearing a cage over an inch shorter than I really am!
In some ways I suppose that's ok, but if  I wasn't going to be using all this extra room, I should have probably bought a shorter harness.

Walking around today has been fairly comfortable so far. We'll see how things go.

I'm also excited about the amount of people that have been visiting the blog this last week! posted my email up on the site, so most of the new readership is from there. It will be sad to watch the numbers drop again on Thursday, but hopefully some of you are interested enough to stick around with me.
I'll be posting either way.
Back to work I go.
Less than a month left. I can't wait.

Sunday, July 28, 2013

What a wonderful upgrade!

My new chastity device came!

I was lucky enough to be able to spend all weekend free of the device. After my Mistress allowed me freedom from my old chamber, I was waiting, rather impatiently, for my new one to arrive in the mail. Saturday morning I went to the post office to get it, and off I drove to visit my Lover.

We were in public with her family all weekend however. We had hardly a moment of alone time for the past two days so sadly, she was unable to put it on for me. This worked out in a way because once I got home I was able to play around with proper spacers, and ring sizes, instead of having to rush to get it on.

It took a bit to figure out all of the pieces, and how they were supposed to be assembled, but after finding a video on xtube I got it all figured out.

The gold lock is the one that came with the device. I am locked now. I made sure to give my Mistress the keys before I left today, so that they are all safe and sound with her. There are three of them. She has all three.

The CB-6000 is so much more comfortable than the last device I was wearing! Not only that, it doesn't show up as prominently under my pants! Double bonus! I feel like this will be a lot better all around. Without as much irritation means I won't have to worry about any more abrasions or cuts from the plastic. Also, no zip ties!

Luchia was surprised that I could even fit into the device. I think she gives my size a bit too much credit. While I might be big enough for her when I'm hard, when I'm soft I'm not much to look at.

I've yet to achieve an erection while wearing this new device though, so I'm not sure how well it accommodates. We'll see in the wee hours of the morning how much pain I'm in from the straining of my cock against the hard plastic... We'll see.

Friday, July 26, 2013

A glorious freedom.

My Lover, and my Mistress came to visit last night for sure. I had missed her so, and I was excited for her arrival. She was excited to see me too, and we embraced at the door as though it had been years since our last encounter.

After our hello's and a bit of catching up, she got up and told me to remove my pants. "Why are you wearing pants in the house anyway?" Of course I did as she told me to. She knelt in front of me and told me to look up as she entered the combination to the lock, and slowly removed my ring, and the cage surrounding my tender penis.

The feeling was incredible. The joy was better than when, after being outside working on a cold we day, when your socks are wet and your feet are sore, you finally come back inside and remove your heavy soaked boots, and dig your toes into the carpet. I was free! Oh what a feeling! I also got to take a look at what damage had been done.

You can see the deep red lines where the ring was, and on my penis from the gaps in the cage.

She took a look at the friction lines and small cuts that had been left by my entrapment, and she massaged my balls, and my flaccid penis for a few glorious minutes. It wasn't arousing. I wasn't turned on by this beautiful woman massaging me. The massage just felt magnificent.

We went on to enjoy our evening as many couples do. We talked about our day, did a few small household chores. I took a shower. It was a wonderful evening. I also had the opportunity to show her the new CB-6000 that I ordered. She agreed that this would hopefully be a better option than the current cage that I have.

That night we cuddled in bed, and for the first time since my release I was able to get hard without anything pushing back at me. What a feeling! I normally take it for granted, but now I felt new again. She felt it too, and reached down to have a feel.

She slowly teased me, from bottom to top with the soft tips of her fingers. She traced the length of my cock with her fingernails and whispered into my ear.

Luchia is such a tease.

She kept me on edge for 20 minutes or so. She would slowly stroke my cock until I was arching my back and grasping the bed sheets and then!-- nothing! She would pull away, leaving me to whimper and beg her to continue.
She did this a number of times that I can't remember, but I'm sure it had to be close to a million. I was ready to explode. She leaned in close to my ear and asked me "Am I being to mean to you? Should I let you cum?"
I shivered. Her voice is intoxicating. It seeps into my brain and shuts everything down when I hear her whisper like that. "You've been such a good boy all week. Putting up with the pain and the scratches...

I was on fire.
She hit one of my key words. I'd started listening to hypnosis tracks by Isabella Valentine a few years back, and that is one of her hypnosis trigger words for becoming more aroused. I had used the same words on my Lover when we had first started exploring each other sexually, so she knows how to push my buttons.

And she did push my buttons. "Ten..." she said. Her half smirk was showing. She was having so much fun! I could hardly notice though. My eyes were rolling into the back of my head. She had me pinned down and was stroking my cock hard and fast as she continued her count down.
"Nine... Eight. Seven, Six, Five!"

I was about to explode! It was all I could do to keep it together.

"Four..." She took her tongue and latched onto my right nipple. Her nibbling and sucking sent electricity through every piece of me! "Three..."
So close...
"Two.. One..."

I moaned out loud. I had been the whole time but I could feel my cum surging through my glands.

"ZERO." There it was. The trigger word we had been using.  She was allowing me to finally cum, after so many days of not even being able to have an erection, and now finally, sweet release! The explosion started in my toes and shot up through my like a firehose. I came hard.

It felt like someone had dropped a glass of warm water on me. Luchia told me she'd never seen me cum so much before. "We'll have to look into getting that semen recipe book you saw online!" She said. I'm not sure if she was joking or not... but she said I had cum at least a quarter of a cup of semen.

I was spent, and I was happy. We cleaned up, we went to bed, and I slept. For the first night this week, I slept through the night without any pain in my testicles from a nocturnal erection gone wrong.

This morning we woke up and she let me cum one more time. She masturbated me and then passed it off for me to finish for times sake, even though she said she would have liked to have teased me for another hour. She had to leave for work though, and so this wasn't a possibility. She granted me freedom for the day though. "Don't put that other one back on. It's hurting you, and I want those intact." She pointed towards my balls. I agree.
I'm going to be free until I get the new cage in the mail. I'm not to touch myself though until then, and I intend on being good.

I have a wonderful Mistress who is kind to me. I see a lot of male chastity online and it's very violent, and degrading.
My chastity isn't like that. This is a gift to her, to show my support for her desires. She loves me, and she has given me so much of herself. My chastity is a sacrifice and a gift that I can grant to her in return, and it doesn't even begin to measure what she deserves.

I love my Luchia. I can't wait until next time.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Decisions decisions

Only about 5 hours left until I get to see my Mistress Luchia. She's on her way into town for business and she'll be staying with me tonight.
I love it when she comes by. I can already feel her next to me!
I can't say I'm not made even more excited by the prospect of being let out of my cage for a break, however long or short.

She will be leaving tomorrow morning. That's not long of a visit but work is work.
I don't know when my new cage will be in. I would like to switch over to it as soon as it arrives! But I want her to have the key for safe keeping...   I wish I had thought to order it sooner.
Will a regular master lock fit in it, I wonder? Or does it only take its own lock.
I could give her the key to the lock  that I already have, and then simply lock myself in when the new one arrives.
It would mean a day of freedom... But that might be good for my sack to heal from the wearing of the current cage.

Decisions decisions...

Who knows what tonight will hold though. I guess we'll find out.

Learning my internal clock

It turns out that I have nocturnal erections at both 230am, and 430am, every night, almost on the dot.
I know this because that's about the time that I've been waking up at night to massage my nether regions with hopes that the swelling organ will give up fighting against it's restraints!
In the past this is the time of night that I might have woken up to lazily masturbate myself back to sleep.
Now I still rub myself, but to a frustrating end. This will be a long month.

I made the decision yesterday to get a higher quality cage. I ordered a CB-6000 from amazon for a good price, and I'm hoping it comes in the mail before too long.

I get to see my Lover tonight. I can't wait. Not so much because of the prospect of release. I've gotten used to my confinement. I just miss her.

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

The good ol boys

I work with a lot of older men. Most of my coworkers are over 50.
I'm actually the youngest on the crew, at the age of 26. The next guy? 39.
These men interact in a particular way. There's a lot of poking fun of each other. Off colour remarks are common, as are insults about being unskilled, bad in bed, gay, or attracted to ugly women. All in all, things that are, unfortunately, considered "guy talk."

Today there were a lot of jokes directed towards one of my coworkers. He is big, buff, and black, and he's very proud of his one foot long penis! We've never seen it, but we've all heard stories that he's told, and heard the stories of women that he's been with. With all of his pride, he is very easy to get to. Tease him even a little and he get's all uppity!
Say he has a tiny penis and well... his stammering and resolute refusal of that being the truth is hilarious to watch.

What struck me today though is that while my coworker was being teased, here I was with my own cock stuck in a confining cage. If any of them had known what I was walking around with, I'm sure the teasing would have been directed in a much different direction.

I felt very exposed all day. My job today involved cleaning things in an old apartment unit, so I was on my knees for a good portion of the day. Nothing could have made me feel more self conscious though as when people would walk about behind me.

We ate a big lunch at a local restaurant. It was delicious, but I ate far too much! This came in handy though because as I was walking into the apartment afterwards I had to take a strange step in order to move my cage back into place so that I didn't pinch me so much.

I know that nobody can see anything. Nobody looks, nobody has noticed so far. I'm the only one that can tell a difference. "I can tell you ate too much! You're walking funny."
Yes, I 'ate too much.' That's it.

Tomorrow evening I get to see my Fiance. I can't wait.  It's hard to go so many days without being able to talk to her in person.

I'm also hoping that she will show me kindness, and grant me a few moments of freedom.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Blood, sweat and tears

I suppose it's to be expected. I didn't feel anything to tell you the truth, except for a bit of pinching discomfort from time to time. After two days or so in the cage though, I have a small line of torn skin at the bottom of my testicles.

I don't think it will be an issue. My body will heal, and it will be tougher for all of the trial and tribulation. I just need to be sure to keep it clean! And I tell you what, I will keep it clean!

I expected something like this, so I've been checking.

I also think I figured out a way to add side bars to the cage so that I don't need to use zip ties anymore. It will have to wait until I get a short reprieve though granted to me by my Mistress. Hopefully she'll see the merit in my idea...

A new feeling of jealously

I never thought I would be jealous of the ability to pee standing up, until my coworker went into the bathroom and I could hear him doing just that.
"Right now, I couldn't accomplish that if I tried," I thought. My cage felt very heavy, but there was also a flutter of peace. An understanding of my female counterparts who go through the same thing.
I'm sorry for all of the times I've teased you by saying "you could if you really wanted to." Now I'm sure that I'm wrong.

Old dreams came back again.

Last night was painful.

I woke up 3 times. The first was a normal nocturnal erection. It hurt, but it subsided after I massaged my balls for a bit.

The second was a much worse erection. This sent me running though. It wouldn't go away. And I've modified the cage a bit so I had something that was wrong.

See without the screw the penis section of the cage can flop around a bit. this leads not only to discomfort, but also in the possibility of me falling out of it!! That not only would break my promise, but it would also be very awkward if it happened in public. So I added some zip ties to hold it together.

You can see the one I put on last night highlighted a bit.

What I had put on before was far too tight for nocturnal erection strength. I had to cut them off and try again. After a couple of tries I finally got one that would keep me locked in, but wouldn't be dangerously tight either.

I went back to sleep, but it wasn't a deep sleep. Obvious because of the dreams... I don't remember much, but I do know that I was naked, and I was driving down the road. I kept dodging my head away from oncoming traffic so that they wouldn't see me. I was ashamed. 
I had to cum though. I Needed to cum! I was masturbating while I drove. Furiously masturbating. The car was swirving off the road some and I started careening over the edge! My left hand swung the wheel while my right jerked my cock. It was a mix of fear and release! I was so close!! The car was held onto the road by only two wheels, and somehow I managed to right it.

Not for long though. An oncoming tractor trailer started honking it's horn at me and I swerved again, this time the tires lost grip as I tried to avoid a sign, and I fell of the edge down an impossibly deep canyon next to the road. 
I was so. close. to cumming... 
If I had just a moment more to fall!
But I didn't.. I woke up, my right hand cupping my swollen balls.

My Mistress, Luchia, says she thinks that I'll go through the symptoms of withdrawal over the next month. I hope that's not the case. I don't want to feel all of those things. But Who knows... I haven't had a dream like that since I had first discovered myself at the age of 10. I masturbate too much normally to have DREAMS of masturbation.

I have to go to work. I'll keep both hands on the wheel.

Monday, July 22, 2013

Day 1

The first night was torture.

I tried to sleep, but my erections felt like they would never subside! I would toss and turn and moan and whimper. My hands found their way to my exposed and swollen balls and grabbed them, trying to massage them and get them to convince my cock to retreat back into it's smaller state once again.

This happened several times last night. I would eventually fall asleep, only to be woken again by a raging hard on pushing at the inside of my plastic prison. Yet I couldn't help but smile. This was my doing, and it was for my Lover. The cage was like the hand of my Mistress Luchia, and she was the one who would eventually set me free, just like she had before in so many ways.

The morning eventually came, even if I didn't. I got up and used the toilet. This takes much longer than it used to before my cage. Having to clean around every small area inside and out is time consuming. But I'm sure I'll get the hang of it eventually.
I got ready for work. Got into my truck and drove away from the safety of my house.

I was nervous.

My pants don't show too much of anything. They're loose enough to hide my added mass, but it doesn't stop me from being nervous.

Mistress says it's because I know something is different, and so I expect others to know too. But they won't know unless I show them. It doesn't stop me from feeling anxious about the close proximity to so many people who know me while I have a swinging weight and padlock between my legs!

For the most part the day went as normal though. I got a few erections. They were as painful as they had been the night before. Some when I would start over thinking what had happened over the weekend. One when I was standing a particular way and my balls brushed very sweetly over the inside of my underpants. And a couple for no reason at all. Those were the most frustrating!

Aside from those setbacks I did fairly well. I have to get out of the truck a different way than what I'm used to. The cage has a large lump on the bottom of it that pokes into my scrotum, and it's the only part of the cage that I can really feel. It pinched me a few times, but I'm not sure if it's something that I'll get used to, or if I'll have to do something about it...

It was about half way through the day when I thought that this would be something worth documenting online. Luchia had suggested that we make a video about the beginning, showing my excitement for the month to come. "That way you'll remember that YOU asked for this," she told me with a grin.

I will see my Lover on Thursday, and she says that if I'm good, she might let me out.

I don't know what I've gotten myself into, but I do hope that the days pass quickly.

It's time for bed now. I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow, and I'm sure I won't get much sleep.

Things are never what you expect

When we walked into the house late Sunday afternoon she disappeared into the bathroom while I unloaded the car.
I started to pick things up in the bedroom. I was going to take a shower. Our time was running out before she had to leave for home, and I wasn't sure we would even get to the best laid plans we'd made the day before.

I was wrong.

She walked out of the bathroom, bare and powerful. she smirked at me. I loved this smirk. Only one corner of one side of her mouth bends upwards, and her eyebrows twitch with the voice of a challenge.

I removed my clothes as well and headed towards the shower. My cage was still in place, yet only with the screw, and it was in need of being cleaned after two days of use.

She joined me under the water as I bathed, and brought with her a screw driver. ahhh freedom! It was a wonderful thing! And even better, only a moment after my cock had been freed, she trapped it again, yet this time in the soft and tantalizing confines of her mouth. She teased me until I was hard, then stood again.

"Go on." She said to me, beckoning me to continue with my shower. I did as I was told. I showered, shaved my cock, balls, ass, and then rinsed myself off under the water. I got out of the shower and moved to the bedroom, and she followed close behind.

The next hour went by slowly, and I am glad that it did. It was an hour that I would have let last forever. We made love with one another like there was no tomorrow, and in some ways we both knew this was true.

She rode on top of me at first, then told me to fuck her if I wanted, and oh I did! I pushed her off of me, we both flipped positions and I held her knees up to her chest as I entered her. I love this position. Wrapping her up like a small package, and then teasing, fucking, and toying with her all I want.

She came twice, internal orgasms, and I came once inside of her. We collapsed into a heap to breath... This is almost always the best part of sex for me. The aftermath, the cuddling, the smiles and silly expressions. It's in the moments after sex, when we're breathless, naked, and vulnerable that I'm the most comfortable about my place in life.

I still had a craving though. I was in need of something more.
We have been experimenting more and more with anal sex lately. She's gotten quite good at finding my prostate and massaging it, and one of our goals is for her to be able to make me cum without any other stimulation except for her finger inside of me.

I love this feeling, and she was kind enough to let me feel it again. I didn't end up cumming from her finger this time, but she did give me quite a good fucking with it.

After all of this love making, time was running short. It was time for the cage to go back on. My Mistress had me gather the pieces of the cage and get them ready. I had to take a drill and make the hole where the screw once went a little bigger to accommodate the lock. From now on this is only a locking device.
I sat on the edge of the bed as I readied the ring around my cock and balls. She took my dick into her mouth and got me hard again. It didn't take much. She tells me she likes doing this so that I can feel myself being trapped and confined.

She knows how to push my buttons in all the right ways.

The cage went on.

The lock was fed through the hole.

"Do you give yourself willingly to me? This is your choice?" She asked me.

"Yes." I felt suddenly a bit apprehensive. She was playing a moment ago and now her demeanor had changed entirely.

"You know that I'll never hurt you. Do you trust me?"

"Yes. I trust you."

She smiled, and I heard a Click.

It was done. I was locked up, and she held the key to the number lock in her head.

I was hers.

This was nothing like the other day. The feeling was something new entirely! I felt more naked than I ever had in my entire life. I had given my penis away. I no longer had the power to grow erect. I would not be able to cum unless it was with her.

I was hers.

I fell to my knees and shook. It was such an overwhelming feeling. One that I still can not describe. Goosebumps covered my body and I looked up at her. She was concerned, but I told her that it was ok. I was happy, and I was willing. This exchange of power had simply left me feeling... small.

I spent the rest of the evening trying to sort out my emotions. I was more in love than ever. I was more sure of it now than I ever had been. To know that there was someone who I could trust so fully filled me to the brim with joy!

It still does. I'm not over the feeling. I hope that I never will be.

Trial and Error

I like to build things.
There are a lot of tools that I know how to use, and even when I don't know exactly how to use them, I do a pretty good job with figuring out how to do things the hard way.

I set to work Thursday morning trying to design a well fashioned cock cage in my mind. I did some research online to figure out some designs, and then made a plan.
A trip to the hardware store that night proved to be very useful. I had several different sections of pvc pipe! I had some small nuts. I already had my drill and other tools, and I could use the heat from the stove to melt things. All would go well!

This wasn't how things went at all...

As you can see, things didn't quite work out. After an evening of burnt fingers, smoke detectors going off, and several sections of ruined pipes, the clock struck midnight, and I decided that it would be better to just go and buy one.

I was meeting with Luchia the very next morning, so there wasn't much time to waste! I looked up the operating hours of the local toy and porn shop and, to my surprise they opened at 8am! Perfect!

I woke up early to get everything done that I needed to do. Switching out vehicles, going to the bank, getting coffee! (and then later, more coffee.)
Finally, at 745 I saw that their sign already had the bright neon glow of the "open" sign shining out of their front window.

Running inside I went straint for the "bondage" room. I'd been here plenty of times before, and knew right where it would be.

I had never looked for this type of device before though... so I had no idea what to look for really, except for what I had seen online.

In a glass case there were several versions of the cb-6000. They shined, they glimmered, they looked amazing... and they were one-hundred and seventy-five dollars.

I didn't like this at all. We're planning for a wedding and I can't spend that much.
So I looked at another one in a different display. The black plastic cage design of the Master Series "Captive Confinement Cage." only eighty-five dollars.

The problem though, is that it only locks with a screw. There's no lock.
I mentioned the possibility of using a master lock on this piece to the store clerk, and he gave me a discount on the cage. Now it was only seventy dollars! He told me to take it to a locksmith.
Reminds me of a movie I saw once...

I dashed off into the car and drove the hour and a half to where my lover and I were to meet! It was a wonderful morning. We acquired our wedding rings, and she got a peak at her gift.

She'd known I was getting her something of course. I hinted at it the night before, but I wanted to tease her. She seemed much more excited about it than I'd anticipated. What amazing joy!

Over the weekend I tried it on. For two days I wore it, without cumming. It did pose some problems. The first ring I tried was too large, and if fell off. Also, without a lock, there was no fun.

I went to 4 different hardware stores before finally finding a braided wire shackle Master lock at Wal*Mart. Just in the nick of time too, or else there would have been no lock at all!

She was warming up to the idea more and more, and seemed to like the thought of being my keyholder, and so did I. I was beside myself with excitement. Although even after wearing the belt for two days, I wasn't expecting what happened when the lock went on.

A decision made.

My Lover and I made a pact.

One month before our wedding we would remain celibate from each other. It wouldn't be easy we both knew, for we'd grown accustomed to our great sex life, however we want our honeymoon to be something special. We want to discover each other all over again.

I made the extra promise that I would not masturbate for the duration either. To her, this is no great task. Women always seem to have an easier time with holding off. For me...

3 days.
It was Wednesday of last week that I gave into my baser desires. For me, to cum isn't just a desire, or a craving, it's a physical need. A strong yearning much like intense hunger, or thirst. I think it's the same for most men. There's just something about having a full body of cum that cries out for release! This was no excuse though. I had made a promise.

I've broken promises before.
I've broken so many promises that I had begun to forget what the word meant. But that was before. Before her. Before my Lover. Before Luchia.
It's a fitting name she's taken for herself, Luchia. She's brought me into the light from where I was before. I used to break promises. My Mistress gives me reason to keep them.

Our relationship has been built on a solid foundation of trust. We have been sharing secrets with each other for years now. Before we were Lovers. She and I have shared many things since as well, and never once have I broken a promise to her, nor she to me!

Understand now why my heart was heavy when I broke my promise to her.

Before I would have shrugged my shoulders. I would have moved on and tried again.

But that was before.

This is a new relationship built on something stronger than the last.

I had made a new promise in my head. A new idea to make things up to her. I would give her the ultimate gift that I knew how to give.

I would give her control over a piece of me which I could not control on my own.

Day 1: Beginnings and endings

This is the end of the first day.
The first day that I've been locked into this new chastity device, with no hope of relief.

It's my own doing that I'm here. I gave myself to her. To my Mistress and Lover. 
To Luchia

We will be married in one month, and I will be bound at her will until then.

My chastity until we're wed is my gift to her, and here I will tell our story.

Day 1...