3 months of Denial and Milking Training

It's been a long time since i've posted anything on this blog, but Mistress Luchia and i have been been playing again.
i have learned of a website over the summer, thanks to the wonder of the reddit community, called milovana. It has a lot of web teases, and one of them caught my interest. i showed it to Mistress and she took that one, along with a few others and combined them into one long training session for me.

i am not allowed to cum for a whole of 3 months which started at the end of August. i gave myself entirely to her for the 3 month period during my milking training, and am now her absolute slave in a Female Led Relationship.

The milking training happens once a week, and i am only allowed to cum if i can do it anally. Mistress will massage my prostate and fuck my ass until she is tired, or until i can successfully leak and dribble cum out of my cock for her, where it will be kept and stored.

so far it's been a month. 3 milking sessions! and tonight is the 4th milking night. i haven't had any success at all so far with my milkings, and i haven't cum at all.
Talk about being constantly aroused! i'm going crazy.
i thought that the chastity period before our wedding was hard, but this has proven to be much more difficult.

Mistress has been kind in that i have been let out of my cage periodically for days at a time. currently i'm out of it right now. This is for many reasons, but basically i only get put in my cage when i really can't control myself to keep from jacking off. i do it sometimes without even thinking about it.

i'll update this blog regularly for any of those who are interested in the progress. Maybe even convince Mistress to help me out with posting pictures.

this is going to be a long 2 months to go. i'm hoping for success with my milking tonight.

For now though, it's time to go start dinner, and then to work more on my Mistress's new necklace. i've taken the key to my cage and am working it into a necklace. i'll post pictures of that for sure once it's finished.

Have fun out there everyone. ;D

Illness is not sexy

The other day we started playing again. I shaved for my  Mistress, and I locked myself up in my cage for her. Then proceeded to insert my plug and picked her up from work.
We went out that night and she had me take the plug out, but she seemed very pleased that I'd gotten myself so ready for her.  She teased me relentlessly, and it was fun, but she didn't let me out of my cage.

Not yet anyway.

The next day, we had to go on a day trip, and slowly I felt worse and worse. Then we figured out that I, unfortunately, have the flu. Oh the timing, oh the awful things.

This had been a terrible few days. I've been oh so sick.
Mistress gave me a reprieve from my cage. "Comfort and getting better are more important than teasing. Besides, you're not getting any erections anyway so it's not doing it's job."

She's good to me.
I'm feeling a little better, so we'll see where things go in the next couple weeks.

I hope to wonderful places. She's been looking at some of the Fem Dom instructionals that I find on KeyHeld, and she's learning things. It's amazing.


Also, I found this tonight through a couple of links! Check it out!


Bondage on a Buck with Mistress Katherine
http://vimeo.com/user6665677/videos

Quick post for a new year.

Directly after my last post I decided that I would go and masturbate a bit to release some tension. 

Then directly after that I thought to myself, "no, you should wait." So I went into the bedroom and pulled out my cage, and put it on, then I locked it.

My wife has the key on the same ring as her car key, so I didn't have the ability to take it off once it was on. I was bound for the rest of the day. I even went to work with it on, which is something that I haven't done since I changed jobs recently.

It was more comfortable than I remember it being. It felt like her hand around my cock all day long, and when she came back, we made love in the best of ways. She teased me quite a bit too. Sexually, not in a mean way.

I'll tell more when I can. Just a quick post. Happy new year everyone.

Being married is wonderful in it's own way

It's been a while since my wife and I have played with the chastity device that I bought. Actually, it's not even come out since before we were married! We're both worried about the chaffing honestly...

We have been experimenting with bondage and submission though. I'm also trying so hard to get my ass trained to take her cock. She's been using a dildo that I bought a while ago to fuck me with her strapon. It's hard to find a good position that will allow her to get any good leverage though...

I spend a lot of time on Anna malace's page, seeing a lot of sissy's taking it so hard and so expertly. Oh to be fucked like that...

I bought a butt plug a while ago that I've been practicing with. I'm hoping that it will help with the anal play. It's a little bigger at it's widest point than the dildo she uses to fuck me. I have to say, it is a lot of fun to use on it's own too.

I mentioned to her that one of the sexiest fantasies that I have had would be to be bound somehow, filled, blindfolded and then left alone for extended periods of time.

My loving wife and Mistress obliged! The next night she had to go to work. It was a 4 hour shift. She would be gone nearly 5 hours total.

She took my plug and pushed it into me. Time was short so it didn't go in smooth. I didn't have a lot of warm up, but that's ok. I understood, and the pain soon dulled.

She blind folded me, and tied my legs spread eagle to the bottom of the bed, and my arms up over me.
She left my left hand free just in case there was some kind of an emergency, however she placed small beads on my body. One at my throat, one on my chest, one in my belly button, and one just above my cock.

She said "you can play however you like, but don't let these fall while I'm gone." She then found a 5 hour long sound file on youtube of some drone-like chanting, and kissed me goodbye.

I had to stay almost motionless for almost 5 hours! It was torture. all I could do was rock my hips a bit to rub the butt plug inside of me. Masturbating didn't work for fear of losing the beads on my body.

All I had to listen to was the mindless chanting. Surrounded by darkness. I had no idea how long it had been, or how long I had left.

It was the hottest thing.

When she FINALLY came home I was so excited. Instead of letting me go though, she stripped naked and the first thing I felt of her was her pussy sliding around my hard cock. It was HEAVEN after so long!

She rode me hard, and we both came in a thunderous orgasm. Only then did she untie me, and let me take the plug out.

I hope we get to play like that again soon... Maybe we'll find a way to get my ass good and ready to be fucked like a slut that I am. 

Any advice?

Chastity is painful in a way I had never expected

"AAARGGGG!"

A quote from my Mistress, Luchia.

You see, neither of us are used to spending so very much time without touching ourselves. She has been keeping herself from cumming as well for this month. She's better at it mentally than I am, so she doesn't need the chastity belt.

However this previous weekend she came to visit, and let me out for the weekend. She is a kind Mistress. I was relieved because I was dying to have a real shower! She did one better though. She touched me, and teased me. She stroked me and ran her fingers up and down my penis, and oh how sensitive it is now!

I was absolutely amazed at the amount of sensitivity I had regained in the skin in just 14 days of it not touching my pants, or rubbing against anything at all!

We played several times that day. Both of us. I made her cum. We didn't actually have any penetrating sex. We want to save that for when we're actually married. I mean, we've done it before, but the point of this month is to make it very special, and tease each other relentlessly! While we didn't have any penetration, we did do some grinding. I was on top of her and slid my penis downward across her sex, and to my surprise, I actually CAME that way!

That's never happened before. The TOP of my dick has never been sensitive enough to feel... well, anything! To cum with just contact with that was AMAZING!

She came a couple more times under my hands, and we spent so much time in each others arms afterwards that it was hard to part.

All this play came at a price though. We are both as raw and as sore as can be! Everything hurts!! I have what is comparable to a papercut all along the bottom side of my shaft, and all around the head of my circumsized penis, just behind the head, is red, and raw, and I even got a blister!

She isn't fairing much better with her lips and labia.

So, with all that being said, we did some talking about the next two weeks. You see, we wanted to do this so that we would be sensitive and receptive to each other on our honeymoon. But we do NOT want to play on the first night of being married, and then not be able to have sex again for a week because we need to HEAL, and walk around funny because we hurt so much!

So she let me off the hook with my CB device to give me time to heal up. Believe me, I won't be touching myself any time soon.

Has anyone else had this trouble? Male or female?

I'm off to get some more Neosporin.

Ow!

Happy to read words of the like minded

I've recently been accepted into a blog aggregate called Keyheld, which is linked over on the side bar. Since then I've been looking through various posts and links that they have on their home page, and one in particular that caught my eye is this one.

Is male chastity "unmanly"?

It you don't feel like reading the whole thing, that page discusses the 'small and worthless penis' fetish that I see all over the internet. In fact, I've had a lot of conversations about this with friends over the years about bondage and submission involving males.

When women are in submission, there are all different types. Some are gentle (although that is rare, I know) and some is very hard core, but there is certainly a gradient of different types that can be found in the vastness of the internet. However when there are submissive males viewed in porn or text or captioned images, it seems like the whole fetish of submission involves taking a man and telling him how absolutely worthless and undeserving he is.

I have a submissive side, and it does go into the realms of kink quite a bit, however watching porn where the man is considered a worthless waste of space is not appealing to me.

Since I've gotten this chastity belt I've looked up videos on chastity and so far, every one of them has involved women talking about how worthless the cock is, and how much it might as well fall off, and how much better they are than I am.

This isn't submission, this is abuse.

When men are portrayed as submissive in porn culture they are often treated like dirt. Their faces are driven into the ground and they are all but raped by cruel dominatrixes. Where are the trained and guided submissives? Where are the men who aren't "tricked" or "forced" into their roll?
Where are the women who value their submissive, and treat them like a valuable resource to them, instead of as a worthless loser who isn't worth the time of day?

One passage from the link I shared above that I liked was this.

Why would she need to bother locking up my cock if it were worthless? That idea completely escapes her; if it’s worthless, then what’s the point? Why even bother with it? Just let it loose and ignore it, then you don’t need to put up with the whining and cleaning and all that. Worthless? No, not for her, and certainly not what she envisions for herself or for me.

No, she wants it caged and controlled. She wants dominion over my cock because she knows how enjoyable it can be for her. She wants to make sure that I’m ready for those occasions when she wants it, and she wants my manly, male energy tightly controlled so that she can focus it at her own discretion. She wants my testosterone flowing, and knows that keeping me sexually edgy has many benefits for her, whether or not she chooses to unlock it. No, Mrs. Edge wants me locked up not because I’m worthless, but because I’m valuable. And that, my friends, makes me feel very special, indeed.

Now, I don't see myself as being the epitome of manliness by any means. I'm not perfect. I'm not a body builder, and I am not always the most confident and controlled person in the world. However it's nice to be treated like I have worth and value, even when I am submitting to someone. It's nice to have the work that is put in be respected in some way.

This doesn't mean I just want to be pampered all the time. I still have the desire to be used, pushed to the edge of my limits, maybe even humiliated a bit. I want to get fucked until I can't see straight, I want to be edged until I go crazy. I want to see how far I can go before I can't take it any more, and then be forced to go just that one step farther! Why? I don't know. However I do know that I can't do it by myself. I need someone who I trust to help take me there.

I'm lucky enough to have an open minded lover, who doesn't judge me for the crazy kinks that go on in my head. I trust her to take me to that edge and then push me over without letting me fall and hurt myself. And she has trusted me in the past to do the same with her.

I just wish that the porn culture would reflect this type of organic style of submission more often, instead of all the masculine rape porn that pervades the internet. Where does all the hate come from? Who really wants to lock up their man for their entire lives, solder the lock closed and then laugh about it? That's not fun, or sexy. That's just mean.

I've always considered sex to be the way that adult best friends play with each other, in the same way children play in the sand box and imagine and play games.
But any child that plays the way some of these captioned images or videos portray, are bullies, and as far as I'm concerned, they have no place outside of perhaps a short lived scene, or extreme fantasy.

One more night gone by

I've finally gotten used to sleeping in this CB now I think. I didn't wake up at all last night with a painful erection, and when I woke up this morning the ring that wraps behind my testicles caused almost no irritation at all due to the morning wood. Normally it takes  a bit of time to pull my tight skin back through the ring to give my swollen balls some room. I had to do that this morning too (and  will throughout the day) but it didn't hurt as much as it normally does.

I thought I was home free! Then I took a few steps.
They've been sensitive, and are growing more so all the time, but I took a few steps this morning and as my balls brushed against my legs I was close to kneeling down and cumming right there.

It. Felt. So. Good.

Can you imagine? Cumming just from a gentle brush against my balls?!

I hope today is easier than yesterday, but the way things have started I'm not sure...

Today is day 11.